sweet spot

To those of you that love parenting babies, more power to ya. For those of you that don't particularly enjoy newborn babies, high five sista....I get you. I totally thought I was a baby person, until I had a baby, and I quickly realized I'm a toddler person, or at least I hoped I was because I sure as heck wasn't a baby person and if I wasn't a toddler person OR a baby person, what in the world did I just do?! 

I feel like stating the fact that babies are hard is a total no brainer, but DUDE, babies are HARD. Even  average babies are hard, but jeez-la-weez, babies like Bram are thank-the-Lord-you-all-make-it-out-alive hard. No joke. I can now look back with 20/20 hindsight and know, times were dicey then. Initially I felt like maybe it was because I just wasn't a strong human being, that maybe everyone was more patient or more cut out for parenting than I was, but even my patience of saint mom assured me, Bram was no joke. I have an entire post labeled "ode to reflux" that is waiting to be finished, but literally folks, it's been sitting in my saved folder for over a year because reading through that post fills me with anxiety and I just can't finish it. 

Ultimately, this post isn't about reflux, or the crying, it's about the fact that this little family in that picture totally survived. And you know what?  It feels like..like..I'm coming up for air I guess. There are these little events that are happening lately that just about cause my heart to burst. They're not big milestones, they're things like going for a bike ride, all of us, at the same time....they're going to the movies together (where Bram lasted 45 minutes, which was a total success in my book!), they're having a conversation with john while the boys play together. I won't even try and kid you and tell you those moments are frequent, or that they last long, but folks, they're actually happening. 

I told john the other day that I think the ages of 4 and 2 may be a kind of sweet spot. The boys are at this age where we aren't being pulled in a million different places by extra curricular activities or homework, but we do send them to preschool for a couple hours a week. We don't have serious fights about real life issues with them and currently, the threat of taking a toy away or a time out work to deter poor behavior. We don't worry where they are at night and we often ( or at least occasionally ) get a full night sleep. They're not totally dependent on us, but they still love being with us. It's a sweet spot, I can totally feel it, and man alive, I could stay here for a good long while. 

Here's what we've been up to

Ambrose:
Lego building. I'm going to really have stretch and think of something else because every single free moment this boys spends building Lego's. All the practice is doing him some good because he can rock a Lego airplane. He's at the point where he digs out the instruction manual, and can follow the directions completely unassisted and either a) build the original item out of the box or b) improvise with pieces that closely resemble that piece and make it work. He also can use his imagination and build tons of things.

Soccer: I'm sure you'll remember that video of Ambrose in soccer back when he was 3. He was far from good and rarely actually participated. We went a different route this year and enrolled him in Smart Start soccer through the base, and it's more his speed. There is a coach, but each kid has one parent attending with them, and the coach sets up circuits that the kids and their parent go through. Ambrose (and Bram) and I go through each circuit and I work one on one with him. It's very basic skills, but he participates the entire time and is actually pink cheeked at the end.

School: AMbrose has an awesome teacher this year and he seems to really be enjoying school. This is the first year they've used the red, yellow and green card discipline system, and this kid is MOTIVATED by it. He stresses and stresses about staying on green the entire ride to school. He tells me about how nervous he is that he might go to yellow, we talk about what kind of choices help us stay on green, he discuesses things he could say to friends when they are making bad choices and he has ev.....He's a total worry wart, and the thought of getting a yellow card just about produces an anurism every gosh darn drive to school. He's a rule follower and a people pleaser.

bike riding: Ambrose continues to love bike riding. He's started venturing onto ramps, dirt roads and loves littering the neighborhood side walks with skid marks :)

Bram:


SChool: Brammy still hates school. He cries his little heart out at every drop off..well, not every drop off, he's held it together once!!  The teacher also mentioned that during most transitions in school ( ie: leaving the classroom to go to recess, walking into music class, cleaning up for snack,  any new person coming into the classroom....) he has a tough time and usually ends up crying at that time too ( so much so that he's sent to the directors office to calm down....which honest to goodness I just don't get why they send him somewhere ELSE to calm down, when they know he struggles with new situations.....). I go back and forth on whether we are making the right decision for bram.

Early Intervention: School is a perfect segway into our introduction to Early Intervention. I had been somewhat concerned about Bram's speech and both his 18 months and 24 month well baby visits and the pediatrician suggested the wait and see approach. At around 26 months I felt that he was still at the bottom end of average and just not really improving like he should. The pediatrician then referred us to Early Intervention for a speech evaluation. I hope to come back and write a post about our experience, But long story short, Bram was Bram and was very reluctant to participate.  the 2 evlauators were total rock stars and were able to get him to at least interact for a while. He was found to have a 30% speech delay, but part of that is because he quit participating, and she couldn't give him credit for the parts he wouldn't participate in. Very shortly after  he quit participating he had one of the biggest melt downs of his entire life! It was unreal, even for me. He doesn't have near as many melt downs at home, I think it happens more often when he's somewhere unfamiliar, in an unfamiliar situation or with unfamiliar people. Anywho, at that time they also let me know that he qualifies in an area called "coping." I wasn't sure what that was, put aparently it's for kids who have a hard time with transitions and in new situations (aka: spot on Bram) and they give the kids and parents tools on how to deal with that. We have Bram's first speech therapist visit (in our home to boot! Awesome!) and a devleopmental therapist will also come to help him in the coping area. I think it's going to be a fantastic thing for Bram!

Legos: Because Bram loves hanging with Ambrose, he has now developed a love for Lego's as well. He usually does a lot of watching and his fair share of destroying too, but if Ambrose is building he's usually there by his side.

Bike riding:

Every single time we pull in or out of the garage Bram is making a b-line for his bike. He keeps up pretty well with Ambrose and John and we are at the stage where we can actually all go on bike rides together. It's pretty awesome! Brammy is also getting the hang of coasting with his feet up, which is fun to watch!


Steph:

classes: I'm taking two continuing education classes online. My certification expires this summer, and to avoid going through the hassle of trying to renew an expired license, I'm taking the classes now. One of the classes has been a great experience and totally educational. The other one is driving me insane. The professor just doesn't have her act together and she assigns a ton of group projects, which in person is a bummer, but over the internet is a total nightmare. I absolutely can't wait for that class to be over. The classes are a large reason why I enrolled Bram in school. I use Mondays and Wednesday to try and get as much school works completed as I can.

1/2 marathon  training: I've signed up for another half marathon at the end of this month. Training has been so much easier without having to do all the runs with the boys. I'm positive my time will suffer without the added challenge during my training runs, but it is a completely different experience without the boys!

mom-ing: It goes without saying, that the boys are what keeps me the busiest. There's a lot of refereeing and tons of putting out Lego tantrums, but the ages 4 & 2 are pretty stinkin awesome!

John:

hunting: One of the only positives of the whole government shutdown/ the jets being grounded is  John has  had a little more free time. He's been using some of that time to hunt. He helped a friend skin and drag an elk out of the woods over the weekend, and then was able to do some dove hunting this week. The time he spends hunting is a restorative time for him. He comes home from hunting trips refreshed and ready to dive into playing with the boys.

work: that's a no brainer, but felt I had to include it or else you'd think he was unemployed.

dad-ing: As stated before, the ages of 4 & 2 are rocking are socks off. They are so much fun right now, and love playing and running around together. However, their favorite person to play with is John.  The boys ask a million times a day when daddy is coming home. Fun arrives when he walks through the door. He is a master Lego builder ( much much better than me, which Ambrose reminds me of frequently), rides bikes and plays every game they ask him to.